My friends and family have always praised my work ethic. My college years were spent as a waitress at a pub, a bartender at a college bar and random on-campus positions. I worked my butt off to move to Phoenix for a summer and then to move to Nashville permanently. Now I work two jobs to support myself in a booming city. So why haven’t I worked hard for the things I’ve always wanted? I think I’ve figured it out.
“What do you want to be when you grow up?”
We’re all asked this as a kid and as far back as I remember my answer was always the same – I’ve always wanted to be a wedding planner. I’ve always loved to plan and organize. But I also love to bake and cook. I love designing and after 8 years in the restaurant industry, I also have a passion for bartending and all it entails.
I don’t want to pick just one. I want to do it all… but how?
A digital marketing internship in 2014 introduced me to the world of blogging. A friendship with the stunning Alex Duffy of Duffy Dossier blossomed the idea into a plan. My blog could incorporate all of my passions into one outlet! I decided I was going to do this and make it work and build my empire. That was the Fall of 2014. Three blog names and about 100 logos later, it is now Spring of 2017 and I’m in a 9-5 administrative job (a creative’s worst nightmare) with no blog and only one reason as to why – comfort.
I like my comfort zone… we all like our comfort zone. But what happens when we get too comfortable? Maybe you wanted to make a big move to New York City, but stayed in your hometown. Maybe you were offered a job position that would have changed your entire career, but chose stayed in your current career because it is what you know.
“The more you start to see the same things, your brain starts to get bored. And when your brain gets bored, your motivation goes away.”
I’ve written this sentence down so many times that it has become one of my daily mantras. It comes from this message a friend suggested I watch from a local church. The message could not have been more clear.
I wasn’t stepping out of my comfort zone! I felt static in life because of the routine I had fallen into. My actions weren’t aligning with my goal and I feared being vulnerable. The list goes on.
So I’m putting my foot down… outside of my comfort zone.
Starting a blog has been put on the back burner so many times because of endless excuses.
- My plate is too full.
- I don’t have the time.
- I’m afraid of what my friends and family will think of me.
- I don’t know what I’m doing.
- I don’t have the resources or knowledge.
- What if no one reads it?
- What if those who do read it hate what I write?
- What if I’m a failure?
I’ve hit a point where I’m sick of my excuses. I’m sick of feeling stuck.
I need to get out of my own way.
Over the past few months, I’ve made minor changes in my life that have had a major impact. If you know me, you know I always love to go out. My life in Pittsburgh was spent galavanting through bars with my best friends. When I moved to Nashville, Broadway was my playground. Late nights dancing at the honky tonks then grabbing pizza at Two Boots in Midtown before stumbling through my apartment door at 3am. Oh, you want to Sunday Funday at Dawg House? Hell yes! Life in Nashvegas is an absolute blast, but what exactly am I getting out of it besides a nasty hangover?
After a life changing weekend at Bonnaroo Music and Arts Festival, I started to realize I wasn’t truly living the life I wanted to live. The months following Bonnaroo were spent traveling, attending music festivals and surrounding myself with good vibes and positivity. My confidence started to grow and I became comfortable in my own skin for the first time.
The changes kept coming.
Staying in on a Friday night has become something I love to do! Instead of coming home from work and being lazy, I’ll work on a new recipe. Sundays are no longer a recovery day, but a day of productivity. I also went on a date for the first time in… well, it doesn’t matter how long it had been. The progression of that relationship restored my faith in dating. I allowed myself to fall in love and I finally let my guard down.
I learned that I also needed to prioritize my life, so I started to utilize my free time for personal growth and stepping out of my comfort zone. A healthy-ish diet has changed my daily energy. Switching from coffee to decaffeinated tea has cut my anxiety back drastically. Typically you could find me binge watching Grey’s Anatomy, but now I’ll watch TED talks and listen to podcasts.
I’ve found myself deep in the internet reading about bloggers who were in my shoes when they first started. They’ve fueled my motivation to get writing in hopes that I can also give someone the push they need. The journey won’t be easy, but I know it will be worth it and I hope to get what I’ve always wanted.